You probably already know that I'm Catholic. And if you're not Catholic, you probably aren't too fond of the Catholic church and all of it's "rules." Maybe even if you are Catholic, you aren't too fond of some of the rules. I can't say that I agree with all of them either but it's still the one church that I feel most comfortable with. And I like the Catholic views on a few things more than other churches that I've been to. Mainly, tolerance of other religions. I don't see that as much in other Christian churches and it really turns me off, enough to walk out of one service we attended. But back to the point of this post...
The Catholic church generally isn't supportive of most fertility treatments. That might be surprising especially since they are also very much against birth control as we have seen a lot of in the news lately. From what I have found, the Church is okay with fertility medications. Then you get to IUI and it is not in black and white. The exception is as long as the sperm is collected in a condom during intercourse, and that condom has some sort of hole or mechanism for some sperm to get through, that IUI is okay. IVF is off the table if you are following the wishes of the Catholic church.
So basically I am doing something against my religion. We do not collect the specimen during intercourse. I don't even know that my fertility office would allow that. They are very particular about how you obtain the specimen. I justify what we're doing because we're still trying to procreate which is one of the biggest church teachings on sexuality. And the way we go about getting the specimen is not exactly pleasurable, especially now that we have to do it in a sterilized room in the lab. But we feel that this is probably the only way we will be able to get pregnant, and both of us have a desire to have another child. We are open to adopting but at this point it makes more sense financially and will hopefully be less time consuming to continue with fertility treatment.
I was thinking about going to confession before Easter, but I don't think that is a sin I can confess at this time because I'm not truly sorry for doing it. I'm sorry that we have to do this, but we will continue to do it until get get pregnant or can no longer afford it. Maybe over time my viewpoint will change, but I can't imagine that would ever be the case if we got pregnant and had a child through IUI.
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Don't feel guilty about what you're doing. As you know, I was raised Catholic too, but I don't really practice anymore. But one thing I do know is that it's a rare thing for a person to completely agree with every rule of any religion, especially the Catholic church. And their whole reasoning against IVF isn't crucial to the main tenets of the religion.
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